Embedding Metaphors and Stories Into Your Writing
When you’re working on anything from sales copy to general information leaflets, using embedded metaphors will help get your audience to do whatever you want them to. Embedding metaphors is a “does what it says on the tin” technique that engages your reader whilst lowering their critical faculties.
I first learned about it when I was researching NLP. Luckily, you don’t have to be a hypnotist or anything for this technique to be valuable.
What is an Embedded Metaphor (and why use them)?
Picture this:
You’re innocently looking at cat pictures on the internet when you see an advert pop up. “THIS WEIRD HERBAL PRODUCT WILL MAKE YOU INVINCIBLE.” There’s a picture of some guy with bulging veins and massive biceps or something who looks pretty indestructible. You think it’s a load of rubbish, but you’re bored of cats and so click it anyway. On the next page, you’re faced with a long article that you immediately recognise as a sales letter (because you’ve been reading my site.) Reading is boring, so you scroll down. There’s the usual stuff: a bullet point list of all the things you’re going to get when you try the product. A picture of the author with a massive smile and a hot girl. A big “Buy Now” button and some testimonials. None of those things mean anything to you though, because you don’t fall for sales copy.
You’re a little intrigued though, because those testimonials sure did seem real. So you Google reviews for the product. The first result says, “Product X: My Case Study.” You read it – it’s not a sales page, it’s just some nerd teenager who does a YouTube video diary. He’s talking through exactly what he’s gone through on this product. “Wow,” you think, “this product clearly works!”
You then go back to the sales page and scroll down and order.
What’s occurred here? Simply put, a case study has changed your mind on a product and caused you to purchase. A case study is essentially a set of embedded metaphors for a product.
What’s The Deal With Embedding Metaphors?
Like we’ve talked about above, embedding metaphors allows us to talk about our product in a very black and white way without actually alerting our customer to the fact. I can say, “Buy my books or you’ll die” and your critical faculties are going to say, “Hell no… that’s not going to happen.” However, I could write a little story talking about how buying one of my books saved someone’s life without ever mentioning the original sentence and it’ll bypass your critical faculties. The beauty of the system is that you can embed as many metaphors as you want within one passage. Here’s an easy example that gets progressively more complex:
“My books on sleep problems will change your life forever.” – Author.
“Hey… I was reading your book the other day, and it changed my life.” – Testimonial from user.
“I was talking to my friend Steve a few months back, and he was in a bad mood. Said he wasn’t sleeping very well, and he couldn’t work out why. Me and Steve go way back, and so I thought I’d look into it and help him out. I did tons of research on his symptoms and found something ridiculous out. I ended up writing a whole book on the subject because there are so many people doing this one thing wrong.” – Embedded story by author.
“Hi guys. My name is Steve. I want to tell you about a book that changed my life. But before I do that, I want to tell you about why I was reading a book about sleeping troubles in the first place. It started when I was seventeen. I was seeing a girl who, let’s just say, was a little weird in the head. I’ll cut a long story short, I was staying over at her place when one night I got woken up by screaming. The shrillest voice aimed in my direction shouting “WHO IS SHE?” Naturally I jumped up out of the bed as quick as I could. I didn’t know what she was talking about.
Bear in mind that she lived with her parents at the time, and they were soon at the door, and before I knew it, they were in the bedroom with the pair of us. Her mom tried to console a screaming daughter, and her Dad said I’d better leave. He’s lucky that I always wear boxer shorts to bed, otherwise he’d have been warning me off whilst staring straight at my manhood.
Anyway, I collected my clothes, dodging a flying hairbrush, and left. I still don’t know who “she” was, and I never went back there.
I’m going off on a bit of a tangent, but I have had problems sleeping ever since then. I don’t want to admit it, but that’s more years than I’d like to count. I’d just gotten used to it over the years, but one day at work I was so tired I almost ran over my buddy with a forklift truck. I knew I had to do something about it. So I put in an Internet search for sleeping pills. They worked for a few weeks, but they caused me a whole load of problems. A few months later I was back on my search for a remedy that didn’t involve me pumping myself full of artificial chemicals that made my pecker stop working. That’s when I found the book that solved my problems…” – Steve’s story with multiple embedded metaphors and stories, and we haven’t even gotten to the product yet.
That story came out a bit more longwinded than I intended, but that’s part of the beauty of embedding stories into your work: they’re stories. They come easier, and they read easier. The above story is a clumsy passage with some clumsy metaphors and allegories in it (because I made it up as I went along) but even despite that, it’s a lot more engaging and disarming than me telling you outright that sleeping pills don’t work and that you’re risking your life if you’re tired. Oh, and your sex life will be saved if you buy the product. (Don’t ever forget a person’s base instincts when you’re writing a sales pitch.)
If a sales letter were to say those things outright, you’d laugh them off. When you hear something third person, it’s a weird quirk of your brain that you’ll think about it less critically.
Final Thoughts
I realise I’ll probably have to write more about this topic, because there are different ways to go about the how/what/when and why of embedding metaphors and storytelling in your sales piece. Until then, think about your own writing and how you could do something like the above example (though less ham-fisted.)
Sales letters have very few elements. That’s why they’re pretty easy to recognise. It’s also why you need to try and do things as creatively as possible. Embedded metaphors and storytelling are an easy and fun way to achieve this.