Most of the readers of this site are young guys. I’d guess that 90% are 18-30 and male.
Now that makes perfect sense, because most people interested in entrepreneurship are young guys. Call it evolutionary impulse of sociology-based, the point is that you’re all young guys, and whilst I feel pretty old, I’m a young man too.
Young men have a ton of energy, ambition and all kinds of positive qualities. However, they also have a tendency to ignore certain things, miss certain things and do certain things wrong. I’m not preaching from a pulpit here – I’m talking from an experience.
There are also many things that young men don’t have in terms of skills or psychological make up. That’s what I’ll talk about in this article and there’ll be a couple more in a miniseries. Note that I’m painting in broad strokes; maybe you’ve got one of these aspects but not all. You’re obviously an individual etc.
Here are some intangible skills that, assuming you’re like me, you need to develop.
You Are Not A Superstar That Can Do Everything
I figured I’d start off harsh and get less cranky as I went along. The first intangible business skill you’ll want to develop is to stop thinking you’re an infinitely adaptable being or a superhuman that can literally do everything.
I wish I’d learned this earlier, because I’d have saved a lot of time and money.
If you’re like me, then you will likely watch videos, read books or otherwise expand your boundaries of what’s possible. You might see a YouTube celebrity and think “this is just talking to a camera, I can do that!” or “I can build my own web app and become a Zuckerberg.”
Chances are you’re overestimating your adaptability, your skills or misunderstanding your personality. Whilst people are adaptable, it’s better to diagnose your own strengths and weaknesses and work with them as opposed to trying to change your innate characteristics.
Why? because you won’t be young forever. Trying to be an extrovert when you’re an introvert is a habit that’ll take years for you to train, and it’ll be hard going every step of the way. It’s better to just accept your introversion and work with it.
There are very few people that have no innate characteristics or strengths, and you’re probably not one of them. You’re reading this blog, presumably literate and of a reasonably high intelligence (it’s not like this blog is some mainstream venue where everyone turns up) and you’re probably into tech and business.
Why try and change that for something you’re not natural at?
Let’s move on. We’ll come back to adaptability in a later article.
Emotional Maturity (Sometimes Outcome Independence)
This is big for a lot of young guys… mostly because young guys all think they’re the only emotionally mature person they know.
In reality, emotional maturity is, well, maturity. It grows as you age. I know you’re thinking of your racist uncle or your annoying professor who seems to have the maturity of a stroppy teenager. It’s true that not everyone develops emotional maturity.
That’s why you have to make sure you do.
I see a lot of young guys who either metaphorically or literally say “fuck the world” and do stupid stuff. This isn’t just a guy thing, but you know, subject of discussion and all that.
You only have to walk around a city centre for a few minutes and see the outward manifestations of this; extreme haircuts, facial tattoos, weird piercings and stupid styles.
There’s nothing wrong with having individual style, but there are a lot of people who you can just tell are doing the “fuck you” thing.
This is emotional immaturity and it absolutely affects people negatively.
You see similar stuff on the internet… the guys on Twitter throwing abuse at celebrities (waste of time and crude,) lifestyle bloggers telling everyone to quit their jobs to start their own blog (buy my course bro!) and the like. Lack of emotional maturity.
Don’t fall into these traps. Respect and good manners are the ultimate (and real) life hacks.
Final Thoughts (For Today)
I’ve run out of time, but I’ll continue tomorrow with some of these lessons.
I’m probably at risk of sounding like a grumpy old grandpa here, which isn’t my intention. But just with the above two general guidelines, you can save yourself irreversible damage later on in your business, career or personal life.
Let’s use a quick example.
John wants to be a YouTube celebrity. He’s a bit of an introvert but he can work around that. His dream is to travel the world, talk about having sex with women and generally attract people based on his lifestyle.
He doesn’t have that lifestyle yet, but he’s going to get it. He’s currently working in a clothing store. The hours are pretty rubbish; it’s part time but it pays the bills.
Still, he listens to one of the guys he wants to emulate on YouTube, a video creator who lives in Bali and says “quit the grind and be your own man.”
So he promptly quits, telling his boss at the clothing store that having a job is for wage slaves and he’s going to live free by being a Vlogger.
John’s boss doesn’t know what a Vlogger is but it sounds stupid and he takes offence to John quitting. Positive reference may or may not be incoming.
After a couple of months, John’s savings have run out, his YouTube videos – of which he’s posted two about real generic “live the dream” stuff – have got a total of 316 views between them.
He’s currently looking for another job and having to explain in interviews why he quit his last job.
He’s not entirely sure.
More on this story tomorrow.